I just want to again wish everyone a very merry Christmas, and I hope everyone has a great holiday. I know that even though there is alot of stuff going on in my life, for the next week or so Im only going to focus on the good things. Im not going to let things bother or get to me. Im not going to let anyone ruin one of my favourite times of the year. Im going to have a good time, and end this year on a good note. Im just going to spend time with my family and friends, and forget my problems.
Stay safe, everyone, and enjoy the opportunity of spending time with the people who mean the most to you, because you never know what changes the future has for us.
Tomorrow Im off to visit a few more people, then going to Halifax for a few days. Probably wont be online much seeing as dad's wireless hates my computer.. so text me.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
What is it to be crazy?
I feel as though I have changed immensely in the last few months. Before the summer, I was this shy, spineless kid who shut people out. Now, upon recalling what I used to be like, I am a completely different person. I am social, more happy, I have more friends, I'm doing new things. I have stopped caring about what people who I don't even know think. I focus more on being a better person; son, grandson, cousin, and friend.
Lately, I feel like everyone is so far away. like there's just no one around to talk to... And I know that there are more than a hand full of people I can go to. But for some reason, there's a voice in my head that's telling me that these are my problems, that I need to deal with them on my own. maybe I do have to face the problems head on. maybe I need to sort this mess that is my twisted thoughts out alone. I just wish that there were hints, hidden clues, as to where I need to go with my life.
Change has never been good for me. But now, I need it. I crave it. I cant stand doing the same things every day. I hate sitting here, night after night. doing nothing but hopelessly staring at my computer screen... it sucks. I have grown more tired of going through the same routine at work than ever before. Every shift that I work feels like the one before it. That's part of the reason I'm starting to steer toward the reserves... Because every day will be a new experience. A change of pace, new skills to learn. A challenge. I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do, but its a big possibility. I'm going to talk it over with dad, and see what he thinks.
Also, to anyone who I have been an asshole to in the last little bit: I am really sorry, but Ive been really stressed with everything, especially the lack of funds and Christmas... But now that everything is done, I hope to be more happy. The thoughts of becoming the age of adulthood, traveling to a new place, and making important changes and decisions in my life will are so exciting, that I hope to be more happy, and have more fun than ever before. Thank you everyone, for being there. I will be here whenever you need me, day or night.
Lately, I feel like everyone is so far away. like there's just no one around to talk to... And I know that there are more than a hand full of people I can go to. But for some reason, there's a voice in my head that's telling me that these are my problems, that I need to deal with them on my own. maybe I do have to face the problems head on. maybe I need to sort this mess that is my twisted thoughts out alone. I just wish that there were hints, hidden clues, as to where I need to go with my life.
Change has never been good for me. But now, I need it. I crave it. I cant stand doing the same things every day. I hate sitting here, night after night. doing nothing but hopelessly staring at my computer screen... it sucks. I have grown more tired of going through the same routine at work than ever before. Every shift that I work feels like the one before it. That's part of the reason I'm starting to steer toward the reserves... Because every day will be a new experience. A change of pace, new skills to learn. A challenge. I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do, but its a big possibility. I'm going to talk it over with dad, and see what he thinks.
Also, to anyone who I have been an asshole to in the last little bit: I am really sorry, but Ive been really stressed with everything, especially the lack of funds and Christmas... But now that everything is done, I hope to be more happy. The thoughts of becoming the age of adulthood, traveling to a new place, and making important changes and decisions in my life will are so exciting, that I hope to be more happy, and have more fun than ever before. Thank you everyone, for being there. I will be here whenever you need me, day or night.
