After watching the Vancouver Olympic Games over the last few days, and and hearing what the athletes are saying... that they have had inspiration, that they've had a dream...
Well, it made me think. and I thought about this for the last 24 hours.
I cant recall ever really having a dream. Not the type you have at night in sleep. But the type where you want to have or to be something so much that you think about it every day all day. Ive never really had that.
Sure, throughout the last 5 or 6 years, Ive wanted to be a lawyer.
I didn't think that much about it, aside from that I wanted to help people, and to bring the guilty to justice. I decided against this, because I know that I can not withstand the stress and ability to be able to do the tasks that lawyers undergo each day.
Then, I wanted to be a Forensic Scientist. I still believe that I could, if I really put my mind to it, but threes not much need for that in this area for one, and I don't think that I could deal with the mental fatigue that came with the career (IE: seeing the bodies, dealing with the thoughts that this is what people can be capable of, etc)
My current career though is psychology, and I'm still not sure if that's what I want. I don't think about what my life would be like if this is what I chose to do with my life. I don't know If I really want this. I don't know.
This frustrates me, Cause I don't know what I want. I don't think that I ever have known what what I want. I HATE decisions, and at the same time I HATE not know whats ahead. I HATE not knowing how this work out... and I'm really frustrated with this... and I just wish that I had a goal for myself. That I had someplace that I wanted to get to.
I'm going to find this place, and I'm going to get to it.
Someday.
2 comments:
Really like your blog!
You would be a fantastic psychologist. -nods-
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